Torvald Gundamson has made Mr Minotaur his b*tch—someone had to say it. Those trees that Mrs Rodhaus grew have me like :0  None of our kindergarteners better spontaneously combust—or else. New "food" options at the cafeteria! It's the Book Fair OMFG!!! We lost so much money in assests after that hot explosion. Anyone for Bowlsketball? Oh, where has Bart gone? I miss the quiet murmurs from slowly dying staff members of the Mascots' Lounge. The music for this episode was performed by Nothings from their latest album Will It. You can find it at Nothings.bandcamp.com Thanks to Weeb Cuisine and Ku Klux Crayons for sponsoring. This month Vice Principal Mr Jonesandmi performed Digimon, a parody of Dig by Incubus. Lyrics: We monsters are digital. Things that walk, some that slink, and those who fly. Most of us have eyes. And some wear a backwards hat in order to look cool and hip and chase the trends of young generations. We all have Digi-evolutions—we were eggs without a mother. So when evil beings piss me off, my human stands there while I do all the work. When fighting something stronger, I Digivolve into a bigger monster—a better mon than me. Hum the theme song, spin around and then annouce I'm transforming—saying my own name. Oh! We all have uniqueness, so don't compare us to some stupid Pokemon. We've heard that for eons. those comments always take digs at us, and leave us super bothered. So when anime weebs laugh at us, I'll blow them up into millions of pieces. As I turn into a stronger Digimon of murder and dismembering and child endangerment. Sing the theme son. Turn around and turn into another Digimon ending in mon. With a flame thrower, this Digimon is now Deadmon. Oh! Help me turn into another—no, it's not like Pokemon evolving. We're separate entities—different theme songs. Remind me how we're the same as each other? Your eyesight is clearly gone. Yes, we're both monsters, when everything's said and done. But Pokemon are clearly an affront to God. 

Please share this with anyone that you think may enjoy it. I don't know where to find my audience.