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On today's Episode:

Change is “wildly complex!” It’s exciting, it’s inspiring, it’s also nerve wrecking, anxiety inducing and scary as hell. Some people do extremely well with change while others have meltdowns and can barely handle the stress of change.

The thing we’re diving into in this episode is not just the external side of dealing with change, but the internal state of change. Whether you’re moving, taking a new job, ending a relationship, dealing with the loss of a loved one, or trying to adapt with polarized political wins and losses, your identity is being challenged at the core of everything.

Maya Shankar is the host and executive producer of, Slight Change of Plans, a podcast about, “who we are and who we become in the face of a big change.” She is a former violinist that was accepted into Julliard who underwent a massive change of identity. Maya later found herself leading as the founder and lead of the White House Behavioral Science Team under President Barack Obama.

Let’s talk about the tactics you need to let go of the identity you’re holding onto in the face of life’s major changes. As Maya points out, some of the changes you experience are willing and others are unwilling changes, but in both cases the value is placed on detaching your identity from the pursuit of a specific thing, and deciding on purpose who you are in the face of change.

SHOW NOTES:

0:00 | Introduction to Maya Shankar
0:25 | How Change Threatens Your Identity
10:32 | Grieving The Loss of Identity
27:02 | Recreate Habits for a New Identity
39:20 | Find Meaning In Suffering


QUOTES:

“In that moment, I was grieving the loss of the instrument, but actually in many ways I was grieving the loss of a huge part of myself…” [3:01]

“If you can identify the things that make you happy about the things you do, and more strongly attach yourself to those things rather than the things itself, it’s going to give you a more stable self-identity as you move through a world that will inevitably change.” [8:49]

“Sometimes the labels or the roles that we want to occupy, or the traits that we want to embody like independence, we might want to revisit from time to time to make sure that our working mode of what that thing ought to mean really aligns with our values and our long term goals.” [24:30]

“Change is wildly complex, and you not only lack control over how you might respond to all those internal changes that are happening, but you don’t control how other people will respond differently to you…” [30:39]

Follow Maya Shankar:
Website: https://mayashankar.com/
Twitter: https://twitter.com/MayaUmaShankar
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/drmayashankar/
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/maya.shankar.14
Podcast: https://mayashankar.com/podcast