September 20, 1999: Symptoms hindsight recognizes
My current dreams? I can’t remember… They’re vibrant yet not willing to escape the realm to which they were created. It’s a feeling I get in my stomach—a dull empty ache that shoots through my entire thought process affecting everything. When I turn the page, I always hope the levels of moods will go with it. Then I hesitate, realizing I need to face every corner with open eyes. The dull ache sits in the center of my soul—a hunger, craving, a need to feast on something. I would love to close my eyes and sleep, only to realize how unattractive that is to my true self. Fourteen minutes have jumped by—I’ve already written two pages. Like food, I have no idea what’s been digested…