In this week's episode I am celebrating all Mamas everywhere! And, while I love all things Mother's Day, I am also cognizant that Mother's Day isn't joyful to all. So, with that said,

To that Mama scrolling through Facebook on Mother's Day seeing everyone's beautiful family pictures and celebrations, while struggling to find your own joy, I see you.

I know that there are women out there who struggle every Mother's Day. Those who can't scroll through social media because it makes them feel so very empty and incomplete.

To those Mountain Moving Mamas out there fighting for your child's very life, I see you.

To those Warrior Mamas who have suffered unthinkable tragedy and lost your children, I see you.

To those Overcomer Mamas that have fought through Hell and back for both you and your children, I see you.

To those Survivor Mamas whose womb has never been filled, I see you.

To those Fighter Mamas who may not have a relationship with your children right now but won't give up until you do, I see you.

To all the Mamas out there who can't look at the picture of my smiling family on Mother's Day without your heart breaking in two,
I SEE YOU.

I don't for one second take it for granted, nor do I post without considering how painful this day may be for each and everyone of you. I see you and I love you. I'm aware that after Mother's Day is over, those of us celebrating will go back to life as we know it. We'll rush kids out the door and off to school, yell at our children to stop picking on their brother, and shuttle kids to baseball practice, gymnastics, cheer, etc... And you, will continue life as you know it, a life that none of us can imagine and pain that none of us have experienced. I wish there was more comfort I could offer you. But, for today, know this. I SEE YOU and I LOVE YOU!

"Now may the Lord of peace himself give you peace at all times in every way. The Lord be with you all."
~2 Thessalonians 3:16

Every season brings a new challenge, new guilt, and new fears... As a Mom , I very rarely feel like I know what I am doing.

To the Mom who just had a new baby and feels completely lost, I see you. I was you.
You have your first baby. He’s beautiful and you’ve never experienced love more deeply than this very moment. You can’t believe you and your husband made such a perfect human being. You leave the hospital, take him home to ntroduce him to his new house, lay him in his basinette and then smile as you watch his little chest rise up and down as he sleeps peacefully. You smile as you listen to his sweep sleep noises and then suddenly realize his chest isn’t rising up and down in the same rhythm it was a second before. You stare intently at the rhythm of his tiny chest. Panic creeps in as you start to worry what would happen if he didn’t remember to breathe. You scoop him up out of his basinette and take him over to the couch where you can lay with him on your chest so that you can make sure he continues to breathe. Exhausted you fall asleep only to wake up at 2 am with the baby still sleeping on your chest. You instantly feel like a failure. DO NOT co-sleep. This was the first rule broken. You realize that you have no idea what on earth you are doing and you can’t believe anyone has entrusted you with the life of another human.

To the Mama with an infant that doesn’t sleep and wants to be held constantly, that is currently hiding in her closet listening to this podcast just to be able to gain a few moments of uninterrupted sanity…. Girrrrrl…. Let’s pause for a moment of silence. I get it. He doesn’t like you and you’re not certain you like him at this very moment. You will get through this. You will survive. That infant will turn into a toddler that wraps his chubby arms around your neck and kisses your face, then a little boy that picks you wildflowers, and eventually onto a young man with the funniest personality. You will laugh at his unique perspective on things and be amazed at the way his mind takes the world in. You will not only like each other, but relish your time spent together and conversations had.

To the stay at home mom whose baby is about to start school, I see you. I remember the gut wrenching sadness of knowing that someone else would have my baby for 8 hours a day. I remember knowing that my children's safety was turned over to someone else for the majority of the week. I remember thinking that they would now spend more time in the care of others than with me for the next 13 years.

I remember thinking that I wish I would have held them more when they were home every day with me and that the last five years had been the fastest of my life. I remember hoping and praying that I had done everything right. I remember praying that I had taught them to be kind to others, to wait their turn, to use their manners, to wash their hands after using the restroom and before they eat, to not drink from the water fountain. I remember hoping and praying that they would be a light to others that they come in contact with. I remember praying that they would remember their personal boundaries and use their voice if that was ever violated. I remember praying that they would not learn about things that would violate their innocence. I remember hoping and praying that they would not bully or be bullied. I remember hoping that their teachers would love them and they would feel cared for.

But, most of all, I remember feeling lost. I had invested 8 years of my life with kids at home I had spent every day having someone that needed me. I wasn't ready to not be needed daily.

Know that this is a new chapter. You've done your job and they won't forget that. They will come home excited to tell you about all they've learned & the friends they've met. Know that this is time to work on you, to get back to who you were before becoming someone’s Mommy. And that chick, well she’s pretty awesome!


To the Mom of a Teen that is standing on what seems like the scariest precipice yet, I see you and am with you.

It seems like I blinked and he’s become a man. 
A beautiful kind young man and there is nothing I can do about it. 

I would give anything to go back to him being 3 years old, standing in the living room in a tuxedo that was 2 sizes too small, asking me to go put on a princess dress and dance with him. I did. And I’m so thankful I did. Because now, it’s other girls that he wants to dance with.

 I can’t keep him from doing stupid things or making mistakes. His dad & I made our own decisions and mistakes and he’ll have to do the same thing. I wish I could put him in a bubble and keep him from getting hurt, but I can’t. He inevitably will think I’m a moron and not take my advice and that’s okay. He has to take his own steps on this journey. Don’t get me wrong, we’ll provide guidance, but ultimately its up to him.  

All that I can do is speak truths into him that I hope he will remember.
I will tell him that he is loved beyond measure, seen and know, and more valuable than he could ever imagine.

I hope to teach him that he is not defined by the number of a test grade or a sports score and that his character is not intertwined with athletic achievement or academic credit. 

I hope that he knows his character is instilled within him and comprised of his moral values.  

I hope that he knows regardless of what path he takes or how many times he stumbles, he doesn’t have to walk it alone & I will always be there to help him back up.  

It’s a scary, scary time to be raising teenagers, but I believe that we can not only do it, but do it well.

When Mommin feels hard and you get stressed I want you to ask yourself:
What if you woke up tomorrow with only what you were grateful for today?

And, regardless of how many times you screw up remember, God made you the mother to your children. You were placed in each others’ lives as part of a master plan. There is nothing you can do to screw up his plan.

Things to remember when raising kids:

1. Kids want love and boundaries. It’s okay to be strict. It is your job to teach them right from wrong. To give them rules. It is your job to raise them to be well rounded contributing members of society. It is not your job to be their friend or the fun mom.

2. COMMUNICATION is the number one key to being a “good mom”.
Talk to your kids. Own it when you screw up. Don’t shame them but instead explain why that decision is being made. Have the Hard Talks.

3. Your kids joined your life. You did not join theirs. Your world does not have to revolve around their activities.
Let’s talk sports. You DO NOT have to make every single baseball game little Johnny plays… he started at 3 and will play until he’s 18. That’s roughly 150 games…. If he doesn’t play travel ball or tournaments…. And that’s for one sport. It’s okay if Bunco Night falls on the same night as a game, go fill your cup. It will be okay. He’ll also learn he’s not the center of your universe which will serve you greatly when he’s a teen.

Let them bleed, meaning let them explore the world. Let them fall and bump their knees. Help them back up while they learn from their mistakes.

Most of all, we're all doing our best in this crazy thing called Mom Life.
Happy Mother's Day!

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