Bring on the Rain

The year 2020 has been unprecedented in so many ways. Because of the deadly Coronavirus, everyone has been scared, on the edge, and has had minimal human interaction. Imagine not able to see your own family, imagine losing loved ones at the hands of the virus—you couldn’t give them a last hug, last few words of comfort. How devastating this time has been for all. And now imagine, being betrayed by the most important person in your life under these circumstances. Imagine being in that pain and also dealing with loneliness because you really can’t reach out to people in person, you can’t go for an in-person therapy, or find someone who could help you get back on your feet. How hard that must be.

This painful but powerful anonymous story tells story of such a betrayal and one woman’s fight to survive and thrive. Events such as divorce and infidelity cause massive emotional, financial, and psychological disruptions in our lives. We hope that having heard this story we can all be compassionate, caring, and supportive of people who might be going through such pain. Our courageous woman of Wayland also shares her ‘tips’ of survival that worked for her below.


Tips to Survive and Thrive

From our anonymous storyteller.

1.Get professional help. I saw my therapist weekly, sometimes more. See a doctor and get on meds if needed. I was having complete black out panic attacks in the grocery store for the first month. My therapist told me that I was in such a state of panic and fear that my brain couldn’t keep up. That made such good sense to me. The anti-anxiety/depression medicine was crucial to my recovery.

2.Find your people. My friends and family gave me strength. They got me through the days AND nights. Sometimes I would just sit on the phone and cry, but they were there to listen, and give a virtual hug, even at 4 AM. I needed a friend to tell me to walk away from the edge, more than once. From a friend, “Make room for good things to begin. You are not required to change all at once. You are required to be brave enough to make small changes one day at a time. Yes, there is pain. There is beauty too. Keep your heart open. Your heart and soul have been telling it to you all along. The person you have been is not the person you will remain. Think of this as both a challenge and a gift. There is NOTHING wrong with starting again. Make it happen. Trust yourself.”

3.Create a space in your life where you feel safe. My bedroom became my sanctuary. Out with the old and in with the new. I got rid of everything. I mean everything. Stripped it right down and started with new. I wrapped myself in candles, music, books, soft blankets and pillows and put wall art up that is special to only me.

4.Start a new routine. Every morning I flip a calendar a good friend gave me, A Year of Positivity. I really look forward to the flipping of the page. Each day is a new start, a new opportunity to be stronger and yes, happier. Every night I soak in a tub of epsom salt and lavender. Seems like such a simple thing but there were days where I just couldn’t take anymore and off to the tub, I went to soak the madness away.

5.Read books! My personal favorites include:
•The Language of Letting Go. Melody Beattie
•Leave A Cheater. Gain A Life Tracy Shorn
•You Got This Whitney Boole
•Radical Recovery Suzy Brown
•Style Your Mind for Success Cara Alwill Leyba

6.Listen to Music. Create a badass playlist and crank it up! Sing and dance with a friend. Scream it out! My playlist is constantly evolving and changing and that is perfectly fine.

7.Get Stronger, not just mentally but physically. Do push-ups, even if you can only do one. Do one. Then do two, three…keep going. Join a gym, lift weights, run, swim. Find strength in your body.

8.Write! Keep a journal. Write everything down. Get it all out. No one ear has to see your deepest thoughts, fears, thoughts but get them out.

9.Lastly, make a conscious decision to commit to you. Commit to a better life, a positive, healthy, life filled with everything you deserve, everything you’ve likely been deprived of for a lot longer than you probably want to admit. You are getting a chance to start over. Do it and be the best version of you that you can be. Be fearless in pursuit of what makes YOU happy, what sets your soul on fire, what makes you, you and keep growing!


Music:


“coffeepot-2” by Oidgnw; “romantic-0n-24mie” by Setuniman; “snowfall-final” by ShadyDave; “censor-beep” by Gowlermusic; “breathing-nose-calm” by Giddster; “meditation-impromptu-01” by Jominvg; “meditation-bowls” by Sandhwani; “hope-tectac9” by tictac9; “Unreal Piano” by tictac9; “soundscape-tictac9” by tictac9 [Link]; Interstellar (Game Music)” by tictac9; “Passenger car braking” by YleArkisto; “coffee-machine-grinding-grains-making-coffee” by Piotr-zyla-radioart-pl, “gems-of-the-sea-loop” by ShadyDave; “Determined” by ShadyDave; “emotional-piano-tictac9” by tictac9